Wednesday, 19 June 2019

Why I Am A Postpartum Doula



“The birth of a child is celebrated, announced, even photographed – and rightly so!  
But the birth of a mother happens in the quiet.
Often in the early hours of the morning, through worries thoughts and questions.  I believe it’s time we celebrate and honour that birth too”

                                                         Sarah Thorpe


📸Hippy+Bloom
Hi there!  You might have read a bit about me on my blog here, and what I am passionate about.  Now let me tell you a little more about me.  People often ask me how I got to being a postpartum doula.  Let me tell you why I do what I do and why I consider it such a special privilege to be invited into your homes at such an important chapter in the story of your family's lives.

I have arrived to the role of Postpartum Doula as a response to my own story.  To me, when I had my little girl Juno, it seemed like everyone else, all the other new Mama’s around me, every single one of them, knew what they were doing and they had their shit entirely together!  I seemed to have stopped reading everything, and I read EVERYTHING, exactly right after the point when the baba was born.  What else was there to know, apart from breastfeeding, obviously? 

I‘d heard about the lack of sleep, sure.  But you know what, I don’t ever remember anyone telling me how with the change in hormones I might view everything and everyone around me, and my place in the world, so differently.  I don’t ever remember anyone telling me how teary I’d be, how sore my body would be, how high my emotions would be and for how long it might be before they’d settle down.  This is a tale for another day.  I don’t remember anyone letting me in on the secret of how absolutely totally exhausting it is to be the one person entirely responsible for keeping this new baba alive whilst your Partner goes back to work to earn the money to buy the food and pay the bills.  I’ve never told anyone except Mark until very very recently about the lady that minded me for maybe an hour in the carpark of Tesco Ballybrack after I’d had a panic attack having just bought swim nappies for a class I’d won that I couldn’t remember entering the competition for. I’d never known you could be so lonely and isolated whilst in and out of company most of the day.  I’d never known what it was to feel so out of control. 

And do you know what, even if anyone did tell me all these things, I’m not sure I’d have heard them. 

The paradigm has shifted in the years since Juno was born I’m almost certain.  There is a much more honest landscape perhaps, less pressure on women to “bounce back” to their pre-baba pre-motherhood lives.  Is this true, or is it the perspective of my bubble, the circles of people I run with I wonder? 

You’ll hear me say often, motherhood has changed me, even with all of my struggles and my lows, motherhood has changed me for the better and has informed who I am today.  And I like who I have become, the woman I am today at 40.  Being honest I’m not sure I’d ever want to be my 30 year old self again.  To my mind I am a more patient, gentle, compassionate and measured woman than I could ever have imagined of myself. 

Knowing what I know now, I hope to hold the hand of new parents to support you and ease your transition in, be you a first or fifth time parent.  My ultimate goal is to support your transition to parenthood, to motherhood, to help your transition be a little more smooth and gentle perhaps than my own.  

We can all do with extra help in these very busy weeks and months adjusting.  Raising baba's takes a village as the old adage goes.  The most difficult thing in it all is to ask for someone to help.  




If you’d like to chat with me about how I can help and support you on your transition to parenthood do give me a call or text on 086 0438642 or pop an email to sandy@communitydoulas.ie



Be well.

Sandy x